Deception Tips Video 25 – Yes Or No
Hey guys, my name is Spencer Coffman. Thank you for watching the Deception Tips Videos, they are all about teaching you how to read people and detect deception so that you will be able to tell if someone is lying to you.
Today we are going to talk about a cool thing that we’ve kind of hit it on a lot of times before, and it’s really the simplest answer is “yes or no.” It’s very, very simple. If you ask a yes or no question, the answer should be yes or no. Anytime it is not, then something else could be going on. It’s not an essay question, so this is up to you, the target, or the person trying to find the truth to ask the right questions. Ask questions that are easily answerable. Ask yes or no questions when needed. Other times you may need to ask narrative questions to get more of their story, so you have a chance to see more leakage happen, but whenever you ask a yes or no question, the easiest answer is always yes or no.
So here it is, this is Deception Tip number 25: The longer it takes to answer a simple yes or no question, the more suspicious the target should be.
Now, this is important because it’s, the longer it takes to answer, notice I said a simple yes or no question. Now, any question that is a yes or no question is pretty simple. Did you go to work today? Yes or no. That’s it. It’s very simple. What are you, are you wearing a black suit coat today? It’s very simple, is it yes or no? Is your shirt white? Is it yes or no? It’s very easy. There’s no explanation needed, there’s no ifs, ands, or buts about it. It’s yes or no.
Now, if it takes a long time for them to answer that yes or no question, then you need to be suspicious of that. Now, be careful, because in Video Number 10, or episode number 10, or whatever number 10 you’ve listened to, whether it’s been a podcast, a blog post or one of these videos, we’ve talked about quick answers of yes or no. So if they, you ask a yes or no question, and they give you a quick answer of yes or no, that could be good.
However, if they lengthen it, or add a description or some kind of an explanation onto that, or if they give you that answer right away, but prolonging an answer, such as like a “yessss” type of a thing, then even though they got back to you right away, they’re adding an explanation and in reality, a yes or no question shouldn’t need an explanation if you ask the question properly.
Are you wearing a black suit coat today? My answer would be yes. Done. Simple. And then, if you followed up with why, well, then I could come up with an explanation as to why. But the first question did not need the explanation. So anytime someone adds an explanation out of that, now that could be cause for suspicion. In addition, if it takes them a long time to answer this yes or no question, that could be cause for suspicion as well.
Now, why should it make you suspicious? Well, because the answer to the question is very simple. They shouldn’t need to think about it. It’s yes or no. They’re very, very easy, and if you ask the questions and, and they’re very simple like that, then why would they need to explain? They shouldn’t feel the need that they need to justify their answer, or they need to do anything further than that. Did you show up for work yesterday? You say yes or no. Now, really what happens is people feel the need that they need to come up with an excuse or justify it.
So, for example, did you show up for work yesterday? If you didn’t or were you late for work yesterday, that would maybe be a more applicable one. You might say “yes, but I was late because my son was sick, or my daughter was sick, or I got in a car accident,” or whatever.
Well really the answer was yes, you were late. And if the boss or whoever’s asking cares to know why, they may say, “do you have an excuse?” Or, “do you have an explanation?” Or, “was there a good reason?” Then you could come up with a reason. Now, in that case, it’s not really a lying situation, but still, that’s probably no doubt happened to you, that you’ve felt the need to justify your answer, and that’s where this is coming from, from a lying perspective.
Liars often want to justify their lie. And they don’t really want to do it tor the target’s sake, they’re doing it for themselves. They’re not only trying to convince the target of the lie, but they’re also trying to convince themselves of the lie. So by saying yes or no, and then adding an explanation on it, they’re convincing themselves of the lie. In the meantime, they’re also trying to convince the target of the lie. But what they don’t realize is that this should make the target way more suspicious because they’re using a yes or no question as an essay question, which does not need to happen.
So if that’s happening, look for some other signs, because they will also be leaking on the body. Because if there’s trying to explain their lie, that means they’re getting more nervous, they’re getting tense, they have something that they need to let out, so there will be a ton of other body language signs that you should be able to pick up on.
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