Deception Tips Video 39 – Liars Yawn
Hey guys, my name is Spencer Coffman, thank you for watching the deception tips videos. They’re all about teaching you how to read people and detect deception so that you will be able to tell if someone is lying to you. Now, over the past few times, we’ve been talking about something that is really cool when it comes to body language and lying and deception in general.
We’ve been talking about a behavior that happens on the face that is so highly contagious that other people do it and no matter what, they can’t even help it. Sometimes they try to stifle it, sometimes they let it happen, other times they may just stop talking and it happens in the middle and then other people start doing and pretty soon it’s like a game of it happening all back-and-forth.
In case you haven’t figured it out yet, we are talking about yawning. Yawning is a highly contagious behavior that liars may use to their advantage. The reason they use it to their advantage is because when people yawn, oftentimes someone else yawns and then there’s enough of a pause between that that whatever someone was talking about they may be able to quickly change the topic or forget about it.
So, here it is deception tip number 39. Liars may yawn repeatedly as if to convey boredom or relaxation. So, are you yawning as well? potentially, maybe not, usually it’s better in person but you’ll notice that after I said that tip then I yawned now it’s like, well wait a minute, what was he talking about? We’re talking about three seconds ago now it’s ten seconds ago because I’ve been talking but that pause is enough to disrupt whatever was going on cognitively between the two people and especially if both people yawn.
So, if I was lying and I yawn and then I get you to yawn, now we’ve got two yawns back-to-back. That is enough of a pause, usually about a 5 to 10 second pause that I could quickly change the subject from whatever you were asking me if I don’t want to answer that then you may forget about it, so it’s a tactic that liars can use.
Liars use this if they are really intelligent liars, this is like liars 2.0, they are using these tactics maliciously to get people to ward off suspicion. It’s also used to convey boredom, so it could necessarily mean like they’re trying to lie to you maliciously. It could also be like they’re trying to tell you that hey I am bored with this conversation but I’m too polite to say so to your face, so I’ll just yawn and try to convey boredom or frustration hoping that you’re going to pick up on it and let me leave or let me go.
We’ve talked about this before with orientating their body away towards the exit like they want to get out of here, so things like that are things that you can pay attention to along with yawns. Also, when we spoke about mirroring behaviors, yawns are one of those behaviors that we just can’t help but copy and you can watch if someone tries to stifle it then they usually clench their teeth.
They’re not going to clench their teeth with a big smile like that, they’re going to be a little bit subtler but you’ll get the point, they’re going to put their lips together, clench their teeth and it’s going to be suppressing that yawn. Liars try to yawn repeatedly, repeatedly doesn’t mean one after another after another, it could just mean more than normal. So, eventually you may ask, “Well, did you get enough sleep last night, are you tired? If they say “Oh, yeah” and they have a good story behind it then okay maybe there really are tired.
If they say like, “Oh, yeah, no, I’ve been fine” or “I’ve been sleeping well” then you could be like, “Well, why are you yawning all the time?” Now you know it’s a big red flag, they’re doing it intentionally, it could be covering up for something that could be conveying boredom, they could be trying to lie. Another reason it could be is because when people yawn, they’re very relaxed.
So, when you get home after a long day work, you lay on the couch, flip on the TV, pretty soon you’re yawning, why? You may not be tired, it’s because you’re relaxed, you’re at peace, so they may try to do that to convey relaxation so that you think they’re relaxed. Usually, when people lie, they’re tense, stressed but if they convey relaxation, maybe you won’t be as suspicious.
So, there are a lot of reasons that they could be doing it, the main thing is you pay attention to that and then start watching for patterns and clusters of behaviors. So, you see one, look for others, then if you see others now you know with certainty that there is potentially a lie going on and you can start prodding and poking for that lie.
If this is your first time watching these videos, I’d love to have you subscribe to the channel on YouTube, feel free to comment with any questions as well. Also, if you’d like some more information, we’ve got books, podcasts, blog posts, all available on spencercoffman.com that are dedicated to teaching you exactly what everybody is really saying, until next time.